Please, Let Me Serve You

I haven't been writing a lot lately because of being off on vacation and distracted with life and busy holiday stuff and such.  But also, I've been struggling to find my voice and find the proper balance between sharing and privacy.  Life's ups and downs and issues that come up make me wish I could write and write all my thoughts and experiences, but the fact that there are other people's lives involved keeps me effectively gagged. (and not in the best way.)  If it were just me writing about my thoughts and feelings, I'd be an open book.  So I sometimes censor myself so effectively that I don't write a thing at all. 

But something that made me feel so good, so submissive, like I have had a medal placed upon my chest that says "World's Best Slave" is such a small thing, I feel silly writing about it.  Mr. G and I have a very modern version of a Master/slave relationship.  I have my rules that I follow and on occasion he gives me a writing assignment or a task.  He knows my life is crazy busy on a good day so he never tries to give me busy work or tasks that don't actually serve a purpose.  So when he asks me to do something, I know it's something he genuinely wants done and it feels great doing it for him. 

So this silly little thing that was my Mount Everest was....finding "The World's Strongest Man" competition video for Master to watch.  I know, it doesn't really sound like much.  And I'm a researching and Internet Sherlock Holmes.  A good portion of my job is finding the spellings of obscure things and I pride myself on my surfing prowess.  So when Mr. G asked me a week or more ago to find this for him, I was like, no problem, I'll have that back to you later.  Only to find that of course it's not as easy as just googling it or finding it on Youtube (as it turns it, it is that easy, I just had to keep checking back like a psychopath, every day for over a week!!).  I still don't understand how this company doesn't market and sell DVDs. 

 

And Master would tease me, too, about not finding it or wanting to watch it.  When I finally found a real link of the actual event and not just highlights, I emailed it to him and felt like I just did something so amazing and important.  Even just typing this sounds ridiculous to me, but it's true.  When I told him I found and emailed him the link, his "good girl" were two of the most amazing words I've ever heard spoken.  I felt like I was on top of the world!

 

And I know this isn't just me.  T was telling me the other day how great it feels to be useful to his Mistress by setting timers for her when she's cooking and needs a timer set.  He said it makes him feel so good to be able to do such a little thing for her, knowing it's something she needs done and being able to do it.  This feeling of pride and accomplishment is such a rarity in our adult lives.  Usually, with work and home committments, the point is that you've done what needed to be done.  It was expected and you just move on to the next thing on the to-do list.  Hearing Mr. G say he was impressed and that I'd done a good job was such a satisfying feeling.  Feeling like you're a good slave when you've just made your Master cum for the 3rd time that day is sort of a given.  That is a satisfying feeling of a different sort.  Feeling like you're useful or that you contribute to your Master's life in a positive or helpful way is almost a deeper, more meaningful emotion.  Even if that just means he can now watch ridiculously beefy men pick up and run with the biggest fucking boulders you can imagine.