this girl's journey: bullet points

Friday, September 7, 2012

To find a particular crop that I've lost in my closet so that I can work on my next Sinful Sunday post.
To have my pussy fucked so properly that I'm sore for at least two days.
To commission an engineer and mechanic to invent the fucking/spanking machine that is also a massage chair from my imagination.
A venti iced non-fat caramel macchiato.
To suck a cock so unabashedly and wholly, that post-orgasm, the cock's owner pats me on the head and tells me I'm a good girl.
Some new lingerie. I really do feel prettier when I wear cuter things (and t appreciates when I don't just wear a stretched out old t-shirt to lounge around in.)
A full-length mirror.
Mostly, though, to stop focussing so much on what I need.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

My Master gets more total and complete control over me by exercising it less often. Now when he talks to me in his Dom voice, I have an even more intense reaction.

Just like my (thankfully, enough to keep me sane) allotment of orgasms. I now treasure them. I don't run off and immediately diddle until I'm screaming like I used to when I was given permission for a play. Now, I have mental foreplay with myself for a few hours first. The anticipation of getting to cum is amazing in itself!

I have decided I'm not a masochist. I crave satisfying my Master, the man I worship, who just so happens to be a sadist. So I yearn to give him whatever it is he needs.

I worry that my pain tolerance is going to be lower than my last visit, and I'm going to disappoint Mr. G. And when I speak to him of my concerns he always reminds me that he'll enjoy it either way. It's very comforting really. He expects me to hurt and cry and beg. I don't have to be brave, just obedient.

I just wish I was more creative at photos/videos. I need a camera person (just kidding, Master). I ache to give my Master good visual stimulus. And yet my body issues prevent me from wholeheartedly throwing myself into this endeavor. It's very frustrating.

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